Heavy Heart

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teepo
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Heavy Heart

Post by teepo » Tue Nov 19, 2019 4:13 pm

Hey Everyone,

As some of you may know, I have had a number of health issues over the past several years. I was trying to come back to the game but in January of 2016 my life changed forever. I had an aneurysm caused by an AVM that was in my head since birth. We didn't know it was there, I was misdiagnosed as having migraines. I had a 1% chance of surviving the aneurysm but I did and here I am. The cost of my survival caused a lot of other issues though. It's no secret I was already slow in some areas and it was due to the AVM stunting my mental growth, but since the AVM's removal via open brain surgery there have been a larger number of issues I have mentally. Part of these issues involve problem solving, remembering information, and a number of other things I won't bore everyone with. Along with mental problems, I have physical issues caused by the surgery. I was partially paralyzed on my right side. I can use most of it but walking and typing can be difficult.

So on to why I'm typing this. Last night I had a seizure while playing. My character died during the seizure and I had the harsh realization that I'm not going to be able to play like I once did. I can't experience the game like everyone else and I'll always need "special attention" because of my limitations. It's humbling, it's embarrassing, and I don't want to be that burden in a game where the players and Immortals/staff are supposed to be having fun. So with this lesson I think it best that I leave the game and accept my limitations.

I want to thank everyone who made this game what it was. There's so many of you who I don't even know which ones you are, which Immortals you play, which areas you've built, but I want to say thank you so much for making this game what it was. It was a life saver for me as a teenager. Thank you so much for what you do.

Take care everyone,

Teepo
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"Try to be a Rainbow in someone's cloud." ~ Maya Angelou
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Harroghty
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Re: Heavy Heart

Post by Harroghty » Tue Nov 19, 2019 7:57 pm

We're glad to have you, and wish you the best. You're not a burden.
"A man may die yet still endure if his work enters the greater work, for time is carried upon a current of forgotten deeds, and events of great moment are but the culmination of a single carefully placed thought." - Chime of Eons
Mers
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Re: Heavy Heart

Post by Mers » Sat May 30, 2020 11:48 pm

Most likely you might never read this Teepo, but a heartfelt all the best from me as well. Its my sincere belief that FK is the kind of game that offers enough opportunities to enjoy it. Even if one is unable to access the more time sensitive combat related portions.

My top moments on this MUD have not been in combat but certainly I can empathise with feelings of burdenhood on others and if that is what you and others who experience this game feel. Leaving may be a healthy course of action.

My hope in writing this post though, is to encourage perhaps, a positive shift in how the game is engaged with you and any others that might scan past this and may be wondering the same. How can I possibly enjoy this game if I can't do X.

When I began playing FK I had some sight and was far more personally capable in my real life and in the game to a certain extent. As of losing the rest of that vision, my life has shifted rather drastically as one can imagine and consequently, the way in which I play the game and have engaged with it changed as well. Doing what I used to do is far more difficult and less enjoyable. So Now even though I still play the same rude alcoholic free spirited mage. he's far less to be found roaming demon pits and riding Dracoliches than he is in Waterdeep flirting with married women.

I find playing the game a lot more intensive now in some aspects and partially due to the change in vision and simply as I get older. I find I am not capable of binging FK for 8 hours straight like I used to. Even so I would call this game one of my favourites and a gratifying way to spend my free time. One which helps me escape those same feelings of burdenhood some of us go through.

Thanks for having been a part of that Teepo and all the best.
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